Day by day
by Sanctuary Dreamer
Summary: Hamato Yoshi never planned to be a father again. But after the accident in which he mutated, he finds that he is now the father of four small turtles. It's a development that almost scares him but he knows he must move forward, and raise these turtles to be strong and kind. One day at a time. Turtle-Tot one-shots, most chapters rated K, mentions of death
1. The beginning

**Not every chapter will be in journal format. This is more to help introduce everyone as properly as I can. **

_September 30th 20xx_

_My name is Hamato Yoshi. Some also know me as Master Splinter. It was a name that I gained some time ago from my bride as I taught her self-defense martial arts. It pains me to know I will never hear that nickname ever again. I am not usually the type to journal out my thoughts and feelings in this way. But for the first time in a long while, I find that I am without a confidant to speak with. Therefore, I feel that this may be the best way to get my thoughts. I suppose I should consider myself lucky to have found this journal hidden away in the station. It seems to be a bit worn, the pages yellow, and wet from the leaks. But, I know better than to look a gift horse in the mouth. Besides this, I have something much more important to speak about._

_After my little Miwa was taken from me, I never planned to be a father again. I didn't think I could ever love someone as much as I could love her. But, things have changed in a way that I never dreamed would be possible. As of yesterday, it would seem I am a father of four boys. Four, small humanoid turtles, that have been mutated in the same attack that I was changed in. These hands which I can't recognize as my own are still taking some getting used to. It's not very easy to write when I have fewer fingers then I am used to. But I am managing well enough._

_I am grateful to have found a home for us in this abandoned subway station. It's not a very clean place, nor is it ideal. But we shall manage for the time being. No one comes through these tunnels, so, for the time being, we are safe. I fear we may still be being hunted after. I do not want to have to put these turtles in danger when I am the one that Saki still wants. But I cannot leave them. So, the only option I have is to raise them as though they were my own._

_I have named them: Leonardo, Raphael, Donatello, and Michelangelo. Their names are tributes in a matter of speaking, to artists from the Renaissance. While they are still young, I can see that they already have begun to develop personalities and temperaments of their own. I hope to continue to help them develop these personalities, and teach them as they grow._

_Leonardo seems to be the eldest of the four. He is not the biggest, but there is a look of maturity and wisdom in his eyes that I simply could not overlook. He acts as a mother, holding his frightened brothers when they were first discovered. Concern seems to be his default expression, which I cannot blame him for. They are only about a day old, and already they have been through so much. I am grateful that he seems to have their best interests in mind, and I hope this continues as they grow older. I have no doubt in my mind that he is the eldest, and he cares deeply for them._

_Raphael is the biggest turtle, and he is the darkest in the color. I feel that he comes next in age based on both size, and strength. I offered him my finger as he began to fall asleep this evening. His grip was extremely promising to me, and I hope we can utilize this in the future. Heaven knows he and his brothers will need to learn to protect themselves in the future if Saki has not given up. But I can't help but worry. He seems to have a temper and has no qualms with climbing over his brothers to push them down to get where he needs to be. We may need to work on this._

_Donatello seems to be the most slender, and the palest in color. While Leonardo had the most intelligent eyes, Donatello is the most observant, and calm. His brothers cried for most of our first night together, overwhelmed and hungry. But Donatello was silent. His eyes were everywhere at once, taking in as much as he could. To me, the tunnel and the station were full of dull colors, with nothing much to observe. But Donatello seemed to see something that I did not. Possibilities perhaps, shooting past like falling stars. He will grow to be a wise child, I know it._

_Finally, little Michelangelo. Out of all his brothers, he is the tiniest, and his small face is sprinkled with freckles. I must admit, he is the easiest to tell apart because of this. He looks to be the youngest, as his grip is the weakest, and the most sensitive. He cried the longest that first night. But, in some ways, he reminds me of what it was like to raise Miwa. He was quick to smile he first saw me, and nestle into my arms. Trusting, kind, and sensitive. I feel he will grow to be a kind young turtle and will understand when not to fight._

_Fight..._

_Yes, I must teach my turtles to fight, as much as I do not wish to do so. They must learn to protect themselves in case Saki ever finds them. I won't let them be taken from me. Not this time. I shall be their sensei. If they will allow it, perhaps I shall be their father figure as well. I'm not sure if I am capable of raising these four by myself. But the least I can do is try. They deserve as much. None of this situation was their fault. They deserve a better home and a better life. All I can do now is give them the best life that I can. I pray that they will come to understand how much I care for them and that I only want the best for them._

_I will do all that I can for them. I won't let anything happen to them. Not again._

_Hamato Yoshi_

After taking a moment to stare at what he had written, Yoshi closed his journal, and carefully set it down on the ground. He never thought this would be his life. Resting on a small lobby couch, next to an even smaller box where his turtles rest. He slid to his knees to peer into the box at his turtles, each of whom was sleeping silently. "Ah, are one of you a little stuffed up?" he mused after noticing that one of their breathing patterns was a tad congested sounding. He leaned a little closer to have a better listen, but the stuffy sound soon went away, and all was well once again. Once he was satisfied, Yoshi sat back on his knees with a chuckle.

"Still as worrisome as ever, aren't you?" he asked himself with a shake of his head. He thought back to the night after Miwa was born. As Tang Shen, his bride slept and recovered, Yoshi was up all night, simply to make sure Miwa was breathing and well. Was he about to fall into the same pattern as he had back then? His eyes never left the turtles as they slept, making sure they were well. He reached out and gently ran a hand across each of their plastrons, running his fingers along their bumpy surfaces. His fingers paused on Raphael's crack, rougher than the rest of the surface, and making his face fall. After an accident in which he was dropped, and took a terrible tumble, his plastron had been cracked. It only served as a reminder to just how truly fragile they all still were. They need him, and could not survive without him. He had to be careful, and treat them just as he had treated his own daughter.

He ran his fingers up and down the crack, mentally scolding himself for his carelessness. But it would seem this was another careless thing to do, as his touch eventually roused the baby. Raphael stirred under his hand, and opened an eye, his face fixed into a scowl. His expression seemed to demand what he was doing, and why he woke him up. Yoshi chuckled once again and began to rub gently. "Did I wake you? I'm sorry little one. Forgive me." Raphael only glared, before finally shutting his eye once again. "You remind me of myself in some ways..." he whispered. "I'd never forget that expression. It suits you more than it ever suit myself, however," Yoshi admit. He continued to rub the tough surface until he knew he was asleep. Finally, he climbed back up onto the little couch and lie down. He highly doubted he would be able to sleep. But he may as well get at least some rest. Tomorrow was another day. And he would need all the strength and energy he could get.


	2. Teeth

I have noticed something interesting about my turtles over the months. They seem to grow and develop at different paces, despite having all been mutated on the same day. Raphael was the quickest to grow physically, growing taller and bigger than his brothers the quickest. He was about the size of a two-year-old, and yet he had the appetite of a teenager. But I suppose that's what happens when you grow so quickly. I try to feed him as much as he liked within reason so he can continue to grow. Leonardo, however, has been the first to reach his milestones. He was the first to speak small words, and while Raphael was able to get the strength to stand first, Leonardo began to walk first. Donatello and Michelangelo are still a bit behind compared to their brothers. But that just continues to confirm my suspicions that they are the younger brothers. Donatello is just starting to teeth nowadays. But, something has drawn my attention regarding his new teeth. Something a bit...concerning.

As Leonardo and Raphael play together in the box that once served as their bed, and Michelangelo plays with his feet on a blanket close to me, I hold Donatello on my lap. When the boys are teething, I try to give them a little extra attention. It seems to bit quite painful, based on how they react. So whenever I get the chance, I try to hold the poor teether just a bit more and do what I can to keep them comfortable. It still surprises me that these turtles have teeth in the first place. Most turtles have beaks, don't they? Then again though, these turtles do not. They have human-like mouths, and cannot eat solids until they have proper teeth. The younger ones are able to gum away at algae and other softer things. But the older ones can independently eat most things just fine. Today, I wanted to get a better look at little Donatello's teeth, as something seems to look a bit amiss about them.

Because of the pain in his gums, he isn't being as cooperative as I needed him to be. He's usually quite the obedient child. But I suppose anyone can be a bit testy when they are in pain. So today, I had to trick him a little. With one arm around him, the other hand holds a chopstick of algae just above his head. I have a small bowl of it off to the side, right next to my hip, and out of sight from the other turtles. I wouldn't want them to think it's their snack time as well. By holding the desired snack just above his head, Donatello has his head tilted back, and is staring up. His mouth is agape as he tries to stretch his neck enough to get to it. I can hear him fussing a little bit, but we'll both simply have to put up with it for now. I make sure not to make him wait for too long, and drop a bit into his mouth now and again to make sure he doesn't tire of this and start to cry.

As he opens his mouth wide for me, I am able to get a good look at his incoming teeth. His two top teeth are starting to grow in, I can see the rigid ends sticking out of his gums. But what is concerning me, is their placement. There is a noticeable gap between them, leaving only bare gum. But how did it become this way? His older brothers teeth grew in normally, aligning just right. So what made Donatello so different? What caused this strange development. As a father, I couldn't help but worry. Would this affect his ability to eat, or his speech?

I lingered a bit too much by mistake. Donatello wasn't interested in waiting anymore. So he put his head forward again and closed his mouth, grabbing my attention. He placed one of his chubby hands into his mouth and gave forth a wavery little sob. "Aww, I'm sorry Donatello," I cooed, trying to offer him the algae once again to soothe him. But he wasn't interested now, too irritated to eat it. His crying had gotten Michalangelo's attention, and he too started to fuss. So, I quickly gave the smallest turtle the algae instead to stop his crying before it could start. It's not that I can't handle two fussy children. But I'd rather focus on Donatello for now if I can. Thankfully, it seems to work, as the little one settled down. Such a sympathetic little child he is. He always seems to cry when his brothers do and smiles when he is smiled at. His heart is so big, one can't help but worry it will come popping right out of his chest.

Once he is settled, I pick up Donatello and hold him to my chest. "Poor thing. What's the matter, baby?" I ask, not really expecting an answer. Based on how he is gumming his hand, I can only assume it's because of his incoming teeth. We don't have an icebox, so I can't give him anything cold to soothe him. He's been mouthing things more than usual these days to soothe himself.

And then it hits me.

Could that be why his teeth have developed in such a strange way? Children explore the worlds with their mouths. And Donatello has been observant and curious since his mutations day. Therefore, almost everything he touches goes into his mouth. I don't always stop him if it isn't dangerous, because I have three other turtles to focus on. I have to choose my battles. But, perhaps I chose the wrong battle to ignore. I am no expert on children, no matter how much I love them. So I hadn't known this could have caused this. "I wonder if it is too late to fix this," I muse, bouncing the sobbing child in my arms. "Right, let's try something new then okay?" I offer, even though he likely isn't listening to me. "We're going to try some new self-soothing methods. No more mouthing if we can help it."

* * *

I wait until after his nap when he is more likely to be a bit more agreeable. Once he and his brothers have awakened and changed, I bring each of them to the main room, the biggest room in the subway station. This is where we spend most of our time. I had managed to find a big enough room in the station for the four of them. I dragged in an old mattress I found and used it as a bed for the four of them. They had quickly grown too big for the box they slept in before. I got by just fine on the lobby couch, however, so I felt no need to find a bed for myself. The boys needed their bed, however, so I got the mattress, and two old blankets. They can sleep through the night fairly well now, so I suppose it worked.

Anyhow, I brought them to the main room an set them down. As expected, they were all off as soon as they were down, crawling and exploring. So much to see, and such little time to do it. They are still only babies after all. Everything is still very new and wonderful to them. I greatly encourage independent seeking and traveling, so long as they are safe. The only one who stays stagnant is the youngest, who sits in my lap. He's still quite young. So for now, I hold him and offer him a stuffed bear to entertain himself with. If he wishes to leave my lap, then I have no qualms so long as the others are gentle with him. He seems fine where he is, however, so I leave him to play.

Leonardo climbs into one of the boxes we still have left over, while Raphael satisfies himself by banging one of his cars into the floor. I suppose he can't damage it anymore then it already is. It's missing all four wheels and the paint is chipped. I suppose I was lucky to have found it after it had dropped down a sewer graft.

I make sure to keep an especially close eye on Donatello however. I need to make sure he gets nothing into his mouth this afternoon. I'm not sure if his teeth can be fixed now, but I can at least try to stop it from getting any worse.

It seems I have my chance sooner then I think. He's playing with a small spark plug, one I have no use for, but could never bring myself to throw away. After fingering it for a moment, Donatello places the end of it into his mouth. Without missing a beat, I reach out, careful not to bother Michelangelo too much. "No no young turtle," I scold gently, carefully pulling it out of his mouth. "That can't go in your mouth." He fusses at me for a moment, before trying once again. I am quick to realize that as long as he has it, it will likely go into his mouth. So this time, I take it away from him. As expected, once I have it, he begins to cry, reaching out and trying to take it back.

"Aw, I'm sorry. I know your gums bother you," I sigh, patting the top of his head. "Please bear with it, for now, I'll figure something out." I can see the two older boys are eyeing me. They seem a little concerned, but I don't have a way of telling them it's okay. So for now, I only smile, hoping that it looks at least somewhat reassuring. But it seems they know what I'm in for better then I do. Even if they don't fully understand why I am doing this at all.

Thus began one of the most tedious days of my life...

* * *

One moment it was his hand. Then it was a blanket. Then his toys. Then wood. Anything he could get ahold of went into his mouth. And when he wasn't successfully mouthing something, he was bawling. I hate making my child cry, especially when I know he is in such pain. But I do not have any other options yet. I try every now and again to place one of my own fingers into his mouth to place some pressure on his sore gums to help. I also try to keep his chin as dry as I can so it does not become irritated. But either it's not helping, or he's mad at me, as he always struggles and pushes me away. It would have been so much easier to start this weaning process before he started teething and I know that. But it's not like I can start once they're done growing. It'll be too late then. Well, who's to say it's not too late now I suppose?

I'll admit, I'm not a perfect parent. I never once thought I was. But I wish I had enough sense before going into this so I'd at least have an idea of what to do now.

The boys sit around me in a half circle, as I hold their dinner in my hands. Once again, the bowl of algae and worms they are all so used to. I wonder if they will ever tire of this meal. Well, that day is not today anyhow, as they are all sitting still, mouths open like hungry baby birds. "You've all worked up an appetite today, haven't you?" I praise with a chuckle. I can get a better look at their teeth this way. Leonardo has nearly all of his baby teeth in now, and Raphael has just as many. Michelangelo is still all gums for now. But Donatello... I can see some ridged ends of growing teeth, and the ever-prominent gap where his top teeth should be connected. His gums are a darker shade of pink, and so is the back of his throat from all his screaming. I feel awful. But all I can do, for now, is my best.

I begin to feed the turtles, one chopstick-full at a time. They seem to really enjoy it, for as soon as one is fed a bit, another begins to vocalize at me, asking for more. Ever-hungry Raphael is the most verbal of them all in this concern, kicking when he feels I am not quick enough. I wish to teach him patience, a feed him only once everyone else has had a bit. But I am feeling a bit too drained to bother right now. I give him food as he likes, just for today. This situation is taking a bit more out of me then I realized.

Donatello usually consumes the least of the four. But that already small appetite seems to cut in half once again, as he only accepts a few chopsticks. Afterward, he closes his mouth. "Come now. I know you are hungry little you, you've hardly eaten," I prod, offering another bit. But his mouth stays stubbornly shut. "Donatello..." I try to make him open once again, watching Raphael closely out of the corner of my eye. He is eyeing the food I am trying to offer his brother. If I know him as well as I think I do, then he is likely about to attempt to take it. "Please won't you have just a bit more?"

Donatello stares at me for a moment, really studying my expression. Then, he leans forward and places his lips around the end of the chopstick. "There's my good boy..." I praise. That smile quickly becomes a sigh, when I realize he is only attempting to gum the chopsticks. The food itself was likely just an added bonus. I shake my head and easily slid the chopsticks from his mouth. "That's a no-no," I scold gently, giving him a small wag of my finger.

That must have been the straw that broke the turtle's back, however, as he simply lost it after that.

Donatello shrieked and fell back on his shell. He begins to kick his chubby feet in the air, almost as though he were riding a bike. Crying and screaming, he's carrying on and throwing a grand tantrum. Was I a little hard on him I wonder? He is only a baby after all... His tantrum is what breaks my own resolve as well I'll admit. That's right. He's just a baby. He should not have to be made to hurt or cry over my own carelessness. I can't bear to watch him like this.

Neither can his brothers apparently. Michelangelo is already starting to cry. I sigh and reach out to pick him up. But the second I touch his plastron, he retreats into his shell, his screaming a little muffled. His brothers watch him, clearly rather disturbed. Poor baby...

Oh...what's a little gumming going to do? He isn't likely to damage his teeth anymore then he already has. And once he grows in his adult teeth, the gap will likely be fixed right? "Alright, I have seen my mistake," I admit, giving his plastron a little rub. "I'll leave you alone to do what you must." He doesn't come out right away. I assume he just needs some time to finish his tantrum. So, I pick up his shell and set it down for now on a blanket so he will be comfortable. Then, I stand up and rub my temples. My legs are aching from sitting on my knees so long. I need a little walk. Keeping an eye on the turtles as they stare at their brother, I begin to pace. Up and down the lobby I go keeping my eyes on them until it pains my neck too much to continue keeping my head turned.

For a moment, I keep my head forward, walking forward, giving my legs and neck a chance to stretch out. I squeeze my eyes shut when I heard his crying become a little louder and not as muffled. He likely finally took his head out of his shell. The fact that it doesn't stop makes me realize he likely isn't trying to place anything in his mouth. He knows I'll stop him. But he really doesn't have another way of comforting himself yet. I already feel terribly guilty. This was truly the wrong time to introduce him to new soothing methods. Not when he still needs his old ones right now. I run my fingers along my whiskers in thought. Even if I try to soothe him now, I fear he may be too upset to settle. I sigh a little, shaking my head and mentally scolding myself. What do I do now?

And then...silence. His crying has stopped. I only hear a few snuffling sounds coming from him. Why did he stop? I quickly turn my head and walk a few quick paces back to where the turtles had been lying. The sight before me makes my heart squeeze a bit.

Donatello has come out of his shell now and is lying on his stomach. His cheeks are slightly darker than the rest of his face because of the tears he had shed. He has the paw of a stuffed bear stuck in his mouth. Michalangelo's bear. As kind as the small turtle is, his bear is one of the few things he almost never shares. But now, he is sitting back, watching his older brother gnaw on it. Leonardo's hand is resting on his shell, and he is rubbing up and down. Just as I did for him when he was upset or in pain. Raphael sat at his other side, holding one of his chubby hands tightly. Donatello was no longer crying now. His breath was still a bit hitched, and his shoulders shaking. But for now, he was calm. I smile, and I sit down by their side, getting their attention. I can see Donatello grip the bear a bit tighter. He probably fears that I will take it away from him. I reach out, and I place a hand on his head, assuring him that it is okay. I won't take it.

I suppose he understands my non-verbal communication. For he just smiles at me now. Perhaps he has forgiven me. "I am sorry Donatello. I did not mean to cause you so much pain. Sometimes, you seem to know what's best for yourself eh?" I keep my hand on his head and run my thumb along the back of his neck. "You should not have to pay for my own mistakes. If I had known I could prevent this beforehand, then this wouldn't have happened. I could have found some new methods of soothing so you would not have to suffer in this way." I chuckle. "then again, a gap between your teeth is not the worst thing in the world. I'll leave you be for now. We can work on your oral habits once your teeth finish growing, not before." Well, oh well. Who knows. It could be a bit cute in the end~


End file.
